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Posts Tagged ‘growth’

Peace.  Clarity.  Healing.  Growth.

That was my final intention while performing my grief ritual this morning.  I wish all those grieving to have peace, clarity, healing and growth.

Peace in accepting their loss.

Clarity in appreciating all of the good from the lost relationships, lost jobs, lost loves.  Clarity in remembering that the feelings brought on by grief are just that… brought on by grief, and dealing with them accordingly.

Healing in moving beyond the grief.

Growth.  Above all, growth.  Growth to get through and develop the wisdom to help others.

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I usually have Fridays off, but this week because of other events, I have Wednesday off.  Fridays I get the whole day with my boys, and my love gets home by noon, so it’s altogether family time.  Today, though, my love went to work.  My boys went to volunteer at the library as they do Monday-Thursday.  And I got some blissful time alone.

I took a long bath.  I meditated.  I got some chores done.  And I did a lot of thinking.  I’ve been in a very stressful job for years now.  And, I complain about this job.  A lot.  Recently there’s been some big changes.  Some of them make the work situation easier, some make it much harder.  I hold all my tension in my shoulders and I pull my upper ribs out.  There’s been a LOT of ibuprofen lately.  And a lot of icy hot!

I don’t care much for change.  That is an undeniable fact about me.  So, I began assessing today.  Am I staying at my job because I’m afraid of change?  Yes, somewhat.  Am I still at my job because they need me?  Well, yeah, they do.  Do I appreciate the relationships/connections I have there?  Oh, absolutely.  So… I sat with it awhile.  I do know that I won’t be there in a year.  It really has no future for me.  But for now, yes they need me, and I love my friends there, and I can continue trying to be the change they need.  So for now, I can stop struggling with that.  I do know that I will revisit this in about 2 months time though.  I’ll take the temperature, I’ll sit with it, and I will decide again.

I decided another thing as well.  I’m going to try to arrange my schedule to have the 2nd Monday of each month off.  I am going to become a practitioner for the Healing Arts Resource Project  downtown Portland.  Hopefully they will accept me (I’ve talked to them before but I wasn’t ready to make room for it), and hopefully scheduling can be arranged through my job.

I feel like that leap will be HUGE for my growth!  I will be able to make new contacts, some amazing connections, and my world will litterally enlarge.

Today was a big day.  I didn’t get much progress made on my projects.  But I feel like I’ve made space in my soul to do so.

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Revisiting

Yesterday my soul sister helped me to revamp my blog.  Ok, she did like 95% of it.  And I just can’t get over how beautiful it is!  After she was done, I went into the archives and was reading some of the old posts.  I always go back to February of 2010 because that’s when my world changed the most.  I read the post I wrote the day Dad died.  But then I went back prior… to see who I was before.

There I found some amazing things.  Throughout next week, I will be reviving some of those posts.  And working on some new ones.  I feel like I re-discovered an old path.

Please join me on this path… I think you will enjoy it as much as I do!

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